The eight things the happiest people do every day

The eight things the happiest people do every dayThe eight things the happiest people do every dayUniversity of California professorSonja Lyubomirskydetails the things research shows the happiest people have in common.ViaThe How of HappinessThey devote a great amount of time to their family and friends, nurturing and enjoying those relationships.They are comfortable expressing gratitude for all they have.They are often the first to offer helping hands to coworkers and passersby.They practice optimism when imagining their futures.They savor lifes pleasures and try to live in the present moment.They make physical exercise a weekly and even daily habit.They are deeply committed to lifelong goals and ambitions (e.g., fighting fraud, building cabinets, or teaching their children their deeply held values).Last but not least, the happiest people do have their share of stresses, crises, and even tragedies. They may become just as distressed and emotional in such circumstances as you or I, bu ttheir secret weapon is the poise and strength they show in coping in the face of challenge.I guess the blog post could end here. Youve got yuranswer. But did you just want trivia? Or do you actuallywant to get happier?The internet has become a firehose of ideas we never implement, tricks we forget to use.Reading a list of things is easy. Implementing them in your life can be hard.But it doesnt have to be. Lets get down to business.Happiness SubscriptionsHeres an interesting fact about happiness frequency beats intensity. Whats that mean?Lots of little good thingsmake you happier than a handful of big things.Research showsthat going to church and exercising both bring people a disproportionate amount of happiness. Why?They give us frequent, regular boosts.Stanford professor Jennifer Aaker says its really that simple the things that make you happy,do them mora often.We have designated work hours. We schedule doctor appointments. Heck, we even schedule hair appointments.We say happine ss is the most important thing but fail to consistentlyinclude it in our calendars.Researchshows 40% of happiness is due to intentional activity.You can change your happiness by up to 40% by what you choose to do every day.And muchof what you do, you do on autopilot. 40% of what you do every day isnt the result ofdecisions, its due tohabits.ViaThe Power of Habit Why We Do What We Do in Life and BusinessOne paper published by a Duke University researcher in 2006 found thatmora than 40 percent of the actions people performed each day werent actual decisions, but habits.See where Im going with this?Happy thingsneed to be a habit. Part of your routine. Part of your schedule.Stop waiting forrandom happy events, you need a happiness subscription.So how do we take that list and make them thingswe actually do every day instead of more forgotten trivia?Lets get departureed.1) Wake Up And Say ARGEven scientific happiness advice is often corny. Ill say that now so we can get it off the table But it works.And this is why you might want to say ARG when you wake up. Its an acronym that stands forAnticipationRecollectionGratitudeIve written about the importance of amorning ritualand how research shows yourmood in the morningaffects your entire day. So start right.Anticipation is apowerful happiness booster.Its 2for the price of 1 You get the good thing and you get happy in anticipation of the good thing.So think about what youre looking forward to. Got nothing youre looking forward to? Schedule something.Recollectinggreat momentshas a relatedeffect.Memories allow us to relive the good times and kill stress.ViaThe How of HappinessPeople prone to joyful anticipation, skilled at obtaining pleasure from looking forward and imagining future happy events, are especially likely to be optimistic and to experience intense emotions. In contrast, those proficient at reminiscing about the past- looking back on happy times, rekindling joy from happy memories- are best able to buffer str ess.Andgratitudeis arguably the king of happiness. Whats the research say? Cant be more clearthan this the more a person is inclined to gratitude, the less likely he or she is to be depressed, anxious, lonely, envious, or neurotic.And the combo often leads tooptimism. Another powerful predictor of happiness.So, corny as it may be, wake up and say ARG And then do a quick bit of anticipation, recollection and gratitude.(For more on optimism clickhere.)All thats fine and dandy.But what do you do once youre out of bed?2) Savor Your Morning CoffeeTake a moment and really enjoy it. Smell it. Taste it. Appreciate it. Corny? Maybe.Butother researchshowssavoring - appreciating the goodmoments - iswhat separates the happiest people from the average Joe.I imagine some of you are saying, Well, I dont drink coffee. And please imagine me saying, Thats not the point.It can beanythingyou do every morning.Andembedding savoring in our little daily rituals is powerful becausestudies show rituals matt er.Heres Harvard professorFrancesca GinoYou can think about rituals that you yourself might engage in prior to consumption experiences. What they do,they make us a little bit more mindful about the consumption experience that we are about to have. Because of that, we end up savoring the food or whatever we are drinking more, we enjoy the experience more, and in fact, were also more willing to pay higher prices for whatever it is that we just consumed. Once again,rituals are beneficial in the sense that they create higher levels of enjoymentin the experience that we just had.(For more on how savoring can make you happier clickhere.)So what other habit can we build into our schedule that boosts joy? How about one that can make you as happy as sex does?3) Sweat Your Way To JoyWhen you study people to see what makes them happiest you get three answers sex, socializing and exercise.ViaEngineering Happiness A New Approach for Building a Joyful LifeTheir findings confirm what had been foun d previouslyhappiness is high during sex, exercise, or socializing, or while the mind is focused on the here and now, and low during commuting or while the mind is wandering.People who exercise are, across the board, mentally healthier less depression, anger, stress, and distrust.ViaSpark The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the BrainA massive Dutch study of 19,288 twins and their families published in2006 showed that exercisers are less anxious, less depressed, less neurotic, and also more socially outgoing. A Finnish study of 3,403 people in 1999 showed that those who exercise at least two to three times a week experience significantly less depression, anger, stress, and cynical distrust than those who exercise less or not at all.Dont like exercise?Then youre doing the wrong kind.Running, lifting weights, playing any sport Find something you enjoy that gets you moving.(For more on how sweating can increase smiling - and make you smarter too - clickhere.)Okay, time to he ad to work. Whats the best thing to do when you start the day? Its not about you - but it will make you happier.4) The Five Minute FavorWho lives to a ripe old age? Not those who get the most help, ironically itsthose who give the most help.ViaThe Longevity Project Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade StudyWe figured that if a Terman participant sincerely felt that he or she had friends and relatives to count on when having a hard time then that person would be healthier. Those who felt very loved and cared for, we predicted, would live the longest. Surprise our prediction welches wrongBeyond social network size, the clearest benefit of social relationships came from helping others. Those who helped their friends and neighbors, advising and caring for others, tended to live to old age.And a great way to do that without taking up too much time isAdam Rifkins 5 Minute FavorEvery day, do something selfless for someone else that takes under fiv e minutes. The essence of this thing you do should be that it makes a big difference to the person receiving the gift.Usually these favors take the form of an introduction, reference, feedback, or broadcast on social media.So take five minutes to do something that is minor for you but would provide a big benefit to someone else.Its good karma - and science shows that, in some ways,karma is quite real.Yes, some who do a lot for others get taken advantage of. But as Adam Grant of Wharton has shown,givers also succeed moreThen I looked at the other end of the spectrum and said if Givers are at the bottom,whos at the top? Actually, I was really surprised to discover, its the Givers again.The people who consistently are looking for ways to help others are over-represented not only at the bottom, but also at the top of most success metrics.(For more on the best way to get happier by being a giver, clickhere.)Alright, you have to start work for the day. Ugh. But there are ways that work c an make you happier too.5) Life Is A Game, And So Is WorkLike the research shows,the happiest people have goals.ViaEngineering Happiness A New Approach for Building a Joyful LifeIn his studies, the psychologist Jonathan Freedman claimed thatpeople with the ability to set objectives for themselves- both short-term and long-term- are happier. The University of Wisconsin neuroscientist Richard Davidson has found that working hard toward a goal and making progress to the point of expecting a goal to be realized dont just activate positive feelings- they also suppress negative emotions such as fear and depression.Many of us feel like work can be boring or annoying but the research shows many of us are actuallyhappier at work than at home. Why?Challenges. And we reach that state of flow only when a challenge presents itself. So how can work make us happier?Three research-backed things to tryTo the degree you can,do things youregood at. Were happier when we exercise our strengths.Make note of your progress.Nothing is more motivating than progress.Make sure to see the results of your work. Thisgives meaningto most any activity.(For more on getting happier by setting goals clickhere.)Enough work. Youve got some free time. But whats thehappiestway to use your free time?6) Friends Get Appointments TooYou havemandatory meetingsin your schedulebut not mandatory time with friends? Absurd.One study says that as much as70% of happiness comes from your relationships with other people.ViaThe 100 Simple Secrets of Happy PeopleContrary to the belief that happiness is hard to explain, or that it depends on having great wealth, researchers have identified the core factors in a happy life. The primary components are number of friends, closeness of friends, closeness of family, and relationships with co-workers and neighbors. Togetherthese features explain about 70 percent of personal happiness. Murray and Peacock 1996Why does church make people so happy? Studies show ithas nothing to do with religion - its about the socializing. Its scheduled friend time.ViaThe Secrets of Happy Families Improve Your Mornings, Rethink Family Dinner, Fight Smarter, Go Out and Play, and Much MoreAfter examining studies of more than three thousand adults, Chaeyoon Lin and Robert Putnam found that what religion you practice or however close you feel to God makes no difference in your overall life satisfaction.What matters is the number of friends you have in your religious community. Ten is the magic number if you have that many, youll behappier. Religious people, in other words, are happier because they feel connected to a community of like-minded people.And if you have the cash, pay for dinner with a friend.Money definitely can make you happier - when youspend it on other people.ViaHappy Money The Science of Smarter SpendingBy the end of the day, individuals who spent money on others were measurably happier than those who spent money on themselves - even though there were no di fferences between the groups at the beginning of the day. And it turns out that the amount of money people found in their envelopes - $5 or $20 - had no effect on their happiness at the end of the day. How people spent the money mattered much more than how much of it they got.Harvard professor and author ofHappy Money The Science of Smarter Spending,Michael Nortonexplains in his TED talk.Dont have the cashfor that? No problem.Take turns paying.Duke professorDan Arielysays this brings more happiness than always paying half.(For more on how to have happy friendships clickhere.)Whats the final thing happy people have in common? They cope with adversity. So what should we do when lifegets tough?7) Find Meaning In Hard TimesResearch shows that a happy life and a meaningful life arenot necessarily the same thing.Its hard to be happy when tragedy strikes. Butwho lives longer and fares better after problems? Those who find benefitin their struggles.ViaThe How of HappinessFor example, in o ne study researchers interviewed men who had had heart attacks between the ages of thirty and sixty. Those who perceived benefits in the event seven weeks after it happened- for example, believing that they had grown and matured as a result, or revalued home life, or resolved to create less hectic schedules for themselves- were less likely to have recurrences and more likely to be healthy eight years later. In contrast, those who blamed their heart attacks on other people or on their own emotions (e.g., having been too stressed) were now in poorer health.In many cases, Nietzsche was rightwhat does not kill uscanmakeus stronger.ViaFlourish A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-beingA substantial number of people also show intense depression and anxiety after extreme adversity, often to the level of PTSD, but then they grow. In the long run, they arrive at a higher level of psychological functioning than before In a month, 1,700 people reported at least one of these awfu l events, and they took our well-being tests as well. To our surprise,individuals whod experienced one awful event had more intense strengths (and therefore higher well-being) than individuals who had none. Individuals whod been through two awful events were stronger than individuals who had one, and individuals who had three- raped, tortured, and held captive for example- were stronger than those who had two.So when you face adversity, always ask what you can learn from it.(For more on how tomake your life more meaningful - without terrible tragedy - clickhere.)See that? I took the eight things happy people do and squeezed them into just seven habits. You can thank me later.Now how do we tieall of these happiness boosters together?Sum upIf you want every day to be happier try including these seven things in your scheduleWake Up And Say ARGSavor Your Morning CoffeeSweat Your Way To JoyDo A Five Minute FavorMake Work A GameFriends Get Appointments TooFind Meaning In Hard TimesWer e allquick to say happiness is the most important thing and then weschedule everything but the things that make ushappiest.Huh?So whats going to make you happy today? Have you thought about it? Is it on yourcalendar?Reading happiness information is useless trivia unless you use it and you wont use it unless its part of your routine.If happiness is the most important thing then make it the most important thing.Join over 330,000 readers.Get a free weekly update via emailhere.This article first appeared on Barking Up The Wrong Tree.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people